Congratulations to everyone who got engaged over the holidays! This is a wonderful, exciting, exhausting time. Enjoy it!!!
Once you've gotten used to the idea you'll be getting married, the questions start...how and where do I start? Well...Planning a wedding is a lot like assembling a bouquet.
You start with the main flowers (you and your groom) then add the accent flowers (your attendants and groomsmen). By the way, before you rush to the phone to call everyone, read the article on www.weddingsbytanya.com regarding selecting attendants. It will save you a lot of headaches in the long run!
Okay, back to building our bouquet. Once you have your attendants selected and invited, then things really get serious. The next step should be to select a wedding coordinator. This person will help you stay sane! A good coordinator will have many excellent vendors for you to select from. They should do their homework, about each vendor, so you don't have to. When selecting your coordinator, remember that one of the most important days of your life will be in their hands for the next 6-12 months. Do you feel comfortable with them? Do you trust them to listen and make your day yours? Have they been trained through some program? A good coordinator doesn't necessarily have to have a certificate, but this will tell you they took the time to learn about the Art of Wedding Coordination.
Next you need to add "greenery" to your bouquet. This will be your vendors. Whether you are planning to have 10 guests or 500, the same amount of planning applies. You will need a venue to do the ceremony. This can be a house of worship, outdoor site, hotel etc. Then you will need a place to do the reception. (Tip...by having your ceremony and reception at the same place, you can save money.) Think about where you want to get married. If you are both outdoors people, don't get married in a downtown hotel!
After selecting the venues, then comes the dress, officiant, caterer, florist, photographer, videographer, baker, rentals (if not included by the caterer), speciality lighting, musicians for both ceremony and reception and don't forget your hair/make-up artist. (Personally, I like to have the music changed throughout the wedding so by the time the dancing starts, you surprise your guests with the "big bang"!)
Do you need a videographer? This is usually one of the first places a couple cuts, which is unfortunate. Without sounding morbid, we never know how long our parents, grandparents or even the people standing with us will be around and it's nice to be able to do back and see and hear them. Besides, it's a great way to entertain your children when they can't remember how dad looked with hair! It's also a great resource for your kids when they get married if they want to work in some of the things that you did.
Select a caterer whose food you like! Do they listen to what you want? Are they willing to make great-grandma's special salad? Can they do ethnic cooking?
When selecting a photographer, take a look at weddings they have done. Can you feel the emotion of the moment in the picture or do the pictures looked posed? Does the photographer put you at ease? (Tip..I recommend that you have two photographers so that both the bride and groom's activities such as getting ready can be covered.)
Your florist should be able to take your ideas and build around them. Be sure to take a picture of your dress with you when meeting with the florist. You want your flowers to compliment your total look.
How important is a hair/make-up artist? Having them come to you will help keep you on time. A good, commercially trained make-up artist will be able to do a very natural look, but one that will photograph well in all lights. You may be going from a darker ceremony setting, to outside, to inside a tent and you want your pictures to be beautiful and natural for all the changes. Besides, your wedding day is not a day for a glamour look, but one that will enhance your own beauty. (Tip... be sure to do your prelims, allowing enough time to try several looks. If you are having a facial, do it several days before the wedding so your skin will be beautiful on your wedding day.)
Musicians...what type of music do you like? If you are getting married in a church, check first to see what type of music is allowed. Some will not allow the Wedding March or any secular music.
The Wedding Dress... (Tip... Again, before rushing out to buy your dress, if getting married in a Catholic Church or more fundamental church, Mormon church, or Jewish ceremony, ask if there are dress codes you must abide by. Some of these religions require the bride to be covered, which means if you want a strapless dress, you need to have a cape or jacket over it.) Your dress will set the tone of the wedding. You don't want to wear a very formal dress with a chapel train and veil if you are getting married outdoors. The time of day and place will also guide your quest for the right dress. When trying on dresses, take only your mother and maybe maid of honor. To many people just make it harder to make decisions. The same goes when selecting bridesmaids attire. Let this be a fun day. Remember what it was like to dress up as a little girl. Try on different styles. It's generally the one that brides think they would never consider that they fall in love with! You'll know it when you put it on.
The Baker (Tip... Think outside the box. I just did a wedding that the cake was a mountain with mountain bikes and a trail leading to the top. The trees went through the seasons in Colorado.)
A favorite of many brides is to have their dress embellishments on the cake. Each layer can be different. Let your cake be an extension of your personality. For examples go to www.elegantbakery.com.
Couples like to save money wherever possible and some good areas are in the decor. It's amazing how much speciality lighting can add to a room to set different moods. www.thewrightgroup.com or www.pinkmonkey.com are great resources. (Tip... When using lighting, I like to start out with soft lighting for the cocktail and dinner then when the dancing starts build on the light intensity as the evening progresses. I've used lighting to create a night-club effect in a ballroom. The lighting transforms the room totally. Lighting and draping can go a long ways in decor.)
There are many other aspects to wedding planning that I won't address here, but you know, every bouquet is finished with a ribbon. This will be your officiant. It may be the priest or pastor, rabbi from your home church or synagogue, if you attend. Otherwise, there are many good officiants who do only weddings that can make the ceremony memorable for you. After all, the ceremony is the most important part of the day as this is where you pledge your love and devotion to each other for your lives. Don't be afraid to visit with several officiants to find one that fits you.
Remember, that everything mentioned above is just the beginning of your planning process. Before setting out on the fabulous adventure, seek out a good wedding coordinator. For more information regarding my services go to www.weddingsbytanya.com.
Happy 2011 and Happy Planning!
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